More Than You Ever Wanted To Know

The legal name is Suzanne Marie Saunders. Suzanne! Not Susan. Not Sue. And especially not Susie. (OK, my paternal grandfather could get away with calling me Susie because his strong Southern accent changed the word into something entirely different. But from English speakers without that accent, the name has unpleasant memories attached.)

I have my Master's degree in Library and Information Science at the University of South Florida. My B. A. is from USF also, in English.

The username comes from a character in a Diane Duane novel (series actually, but each novel focuses most strongly on one character), The Door Into Shadow. My other favorite alias in Minerva, from Robert A. Heinlein'sTime Enough For Love and its sequels. My best friend/boyfriend even calls me "Minnie" in conversation sometimes. But that username is usually taken, so I just have to identify myself as my warrior/sorceress persona instead of my ex-computer persona. Jon will just have to get used to calling me 'Berend (that, in the language of Duane's fantasy world, is apparently a logical nickname for Segnbora. No weirder than "Peggy" from Margaret, I suppose.)

The choice of "Segnbora" comes from the fact that the character was sexually abused in childhood, as was I. She goes on to become strong and capable in various areas of her life, but still flawed and unable to cope with certain things. So I identify, though my abuse was not as severe as that portrayed in the book. The MMPI test says I'm very nearly clinically depressed, and my former therapist suggested that I may have some of the symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder. But it's not consistently that severe, so it's hard to say (and anyway he didn't like labeling people. With which I partially agree, though sometimes it's nice to have a label as a reason for all the stuff I go through.) Anyway, Segnbora goes through several crises and heals herself. It took rather longer for me, but I feel like I'm through the worst that my brain and my past can throw at me.

"Minerva," on the other hand, from the Heinlein novels, was a computer whose mind is transferred into a human body, mostly for the sake of being together with the people she loves. I feel like that happened to me, around the beginning of college when I acquired a social life.

I told you this was more than you wanted to know about me. 8) I have been asked what on earth possessed me to put such personal information on the Web. (For some reason, that slightly incredulous question feels like a compliment.) I suppose so no one can have any illusions about who it is that they are getting to know. And to save myself the difficult task of saying this stuff aloud to anyone -- I can just point them to my homepage!

If you want to know more about me, you can visit my Writing Page, which has lots of personal essays as well as some fiction and poetry. Or you can even check out my childhood diaries (the actual contents of my diary from the age of 8 to 18).

Damn, you got this far? Well, if you want, you can check out some photos of me and friends and see how badly I don't look like whatever picture you've built up. I'm the one with the long hair. Or you can see what I've gotten all those online "What ____ Are You?" quizzes.

Comments? Send to me atsegnbora@amuck.com. Or go to my:

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